Praise be, praise be… since April we have witnessed not one, not two, not even three, but a whole carnival of miracles and all of them revolving around St Andrew and St Danny, just two pure and innocent children who could do no wrong.
I used to date this girl that thought of herself as a bit of a hippy chic. To be honest I wasn’t listening when she went on about chakra’s and crystal healing but she was quite attractive so I’d nod in appropriate places.
Anyway, one of the pie in the sky things she used to go on about was something called the ‘Indigo Children’. Its basically this idea that there are a certain % of children in the World today with higher emotional and psychological abilities than is normal. Its just really a load of made up nonsense, but now I am starting to think I was wrong and that maybe these two innocent lambs are indeed Indigo Children.
(An Indigo Child)
There was the Miracle of The Recovering Dog. It may sound a impossible but only weeks after they made that footage the dog was skipping about the garden all happy and healthy. This is nothing short of a MIRACLE and one can only assume that Saint Andy and Saint Danny literally restored ‘Baby’ to health.
By a TOTALLY UNFORTUNATE AND UNRELATED COINCIDENCE THE DOG HAD TO BE PUT DOWN WEEKS LATER. But it totally had nothing to do with what happened or anything. No way.
(According to one non qualified source there is “no way that this could have aroused suspicion in a professional vet”)
(“Just no way”. Right?)
There was the Miracle of The Surgery Visit. Despite being subjected to a prolonged and sickening attack and then left to rot for three months by using the powers of alchemy the family were able to remove any trace of suspicion at all from a professional vet. This can only and surely be ANOTHER MIRACLE.
There was the Miracle of the Non Sentence Sentence. Having bungled and ended up in court now was surely the time that someone in power would show them. But in ANOTHER miracle the magistrates were hypnostised into thinking they were really watching an episode of Button Moon. They were free – another MIRACLE.
(Not Indigo Children. Just two cunts)
There was the Miracle of the Device Non Seizure. Despite successive Govs handing probably too many powers to police to seize devices when it comes to making a home made torture video then in no way would it be a good use of those powers to use them to go through their other stuff. It is a MIRACLE that they did not.
There is the Miracle of the Changing Rules. According to the terms of a curfew the prisoners must remain at the same address for the duration of their curfew. Despite no one ever laying a glove on them they have moved four times in three months if you count the two separate hotel moves. Another amazing miracle!
There is the Miracle of The Silent. Despite constantly being asked a number of totally brilliant questions no one in authority will answer anything about anything. This is again due to an incredible MIRACLE.
There is the Miracle of the Non Crime Crimes.
When any ordinary person so much as dares take a photo in public they are bothered for no real reason, but when the public say to the authorities “Hey, not too happy with AF’s chat about wanting to find more dogs to torture and pretty unhappy with his remarks about kids, so please comment” all of those things are considered okay and not crimes. It can only be another MIRACLE.
While ex serviceman take their chances in a door way tonight St Andy and Danny (who couldn’t do any wrong) are relaxing in a hotel in Sheffield. IT IS A MIRACLE.
(Around a quarter of those living rough are ex servicemen. No Travel Lodge for them)
While young people struggle to find a place to say these two Saints and the Virgin Vannah have had more homes than a monopoly player. Another MIRACLE.
And so it goes on, the lies, the deceptions, the silence and the inverted system that rewards sadists and keeps the good down.